Subtle Signs You’re Being Manipulated By a Covert Abuser

This post left chills down my spine…. It has been so hard for me to explain to others what my marriage was like, because my ex-husband was so charming, and people liked him so much. But, it felt like this woman was writing about my marriage instead of her own. I think this is important information for people to have.

Lessons From the End of a Marriage

Covert abuse is sneaky.

It doesn’t leave a bruise on your cheek.

Or cut you down with scathing words.

Or even obviously isolate you from others.

Instead, it wisps in slowly through tiny cracks. Velvet-trimmed lies whispered into trusting ears. The smoke builds until you no longer remember what it is like to see clearly and your head is filled more with the thoughts of your abuser than with your own.

It’s often only possible to identify covert abuse once you have escaped its clutches (and even then, it usually takes a period of months or years to fully grasp what happened). It’s like a domestic form of Stockholm Syndrome, the persecutor masquerading as a protector.

The following are the subtle signs that were present in my ex husband. Small dots of data that when connected, paint a crimson flag of warning. If you see a preponderance of…

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